"Let Them" – A Permission Slip I Didn’t Know I Needed

Right now, I’m sitting on a wooden Bierbank in the quiet countryside near the Lüneburger Heide, Leila (my dog) snoring softly next to me, my heart strangely full. I came here for a little solo getaway – five days just for me (and her – plus the sheep, the bunnies, the chickens, the deer... I could go on, but you get the idea). No pressure, no plans, just a change of scenery. I packed my yoga mat, a few books, and a bunch of good intentions. But what ended up moving me the most wasn’t on my original list.

A few days before I left, I FaceTimed with my friend Lisa – yes, another Lisa ☺️ – and we got into one of those nourishing conversations that stay with you long after you hang up. She mentioned a concept from Mel Robbins’ book called "Let Them." I had seen Mel on Instagram, but I didn’t know about the book. Still, something about it struck a chord. I immediately downloaded the audiobook and started listening during my first long walk with Leila here.

And wow. It’s been sitting with me ever since.

The idea is simple – but not necessarily easy. Mel says we waste so much energy trying to change things (or people) we simply cannot control. We try to explain ourselves, convince others, fix their perception of us, manage their emotions, or micro-manage outcomes that aren't really ours to own. We tighten up, push harder, overcompensate, people-please… all in an effort to avoid being misunderstood or disliked.

But what if… we just let them?

Let them think what they want.
Let them say what they say.
Let them act however they’re going to act.

And we stay anchored in ourselves.

Sounds radical, right? Especially for those of us who are highly emotional, involved, passionate people (hello, half-Italian here 🙋🏻‍♀️). For the longest time, I felt responsible for the emotional temperature of every room I entered – in work meetings, in emails, with clients, with collaborators. Always trying to be the glue, the buffer, the mind-reader. Always managing impressions.

But what if I don’t?

What if I stop trying to preempt how someone might respond?
What if I stop justifying decisions that are already aligned with my values?
What if I stop over-explaining to avoid discomfort?
What if I stop carrying the invisible pressure to "hold it all together"?

This idea has me re-evaluating how I move through my day-to-day work life. As someone running a digital agency, I’ve often found myself spending so much energy trying to smooth things out, solve everything at lightning speed, or take on more than necessary to avoid conflict or disappointment. I’ve had to learn how to regulate myself. But now, I’m also learning to release myself.

Let the client be frustrated – and trust that we’ll get to the root of it later.
Let someone have a different opinion about how something should be done.
Let the team make small mistakes and grow from them.
Let others lead. Let go of needing to be the one who always knows.

This isn’t about not caring. Quite the opposite. It’s about choosing where to place our care intentionally, instead of spreading it thin trying to fix or control things outside our reach.

So here I am, writing this post somewhere between ancient trees, sheep grazing quietly, and birds singing – taking a deep breath and choosing to let some things – and some people – just be.

And maybe you needed to hear this today, too.
Whatever it is you're trying to fix, prove, explain, or carry – ask yourself: What would happen if you just… let them?

With love and a little less tension,
Lisa

Sending a little love from my solo tiny house escape ❤️ (you can rent it here)